I’m Getting Sued!

A woman in blue scrubs is performing acupuncture on a young man's thigh as he lies on a massage table. He reacts with surprise and discomfort.

"that IT band's the problem right there. Dude, shut up. Oh."

Setting: acupuncture or physical therapy room — soft, warm light from a lamp on the left

The woman inserts another needle, causing the man to flinch and question why he was told it wouldn't hurt. The woman admits she should have started with easier spots.

"Oh. Why'd Heather say it doesn't hurt at all? Well, I should have started with the easy ones."

Setting: treatment room — soft, ambient indoor lighting

The man lies on the table, now with several needles in his legs, and asks the practitioner about her training. The shot is wide, showing the whole room.

"You just went to school for this and they teach you where to put it and stuff? Yeah. It's kind of crazy."

Setting: treatment room — bright, even indoor lighting

The practitioner removes the needles and wires from the man's leg. He expresses relief.

"Who knows, they're always after something. Oh, did you take 'em out of the leg already? Oh, hell yes."

Setting: treatment room — soft, warm indoor light

Danny Duncan walks out of a building into a parking lot. An older man in a uniform approaches him, asks his name, and tells him he's been served.

"You Daniel? You've been served? You've been served, dude. Oh, shit. Well, almost."

Setting: parking lot — bright, natural daylight

The process server hands Danny the papers. Danny reads them with a smirk, expressing amusement. The server informs him of the court date in California.

"Plaintiff claim and order to go to small claims court. Oh, I love this shit. Yeah, I know. For tomorrow morning at 8:30 out in California."

Setting: parking lot — bright daylight, casting shadows

Danny continues to read the lawsuit, confused by the plaintiff's name, 'Dong Woo'. The process server explains that the person claims Danny owes them money.

"It's from Dong Woo. Who is Dong? I don't even know who that is. I have no clue. He said you owe him money."

Setting: parking lot — bright, sunny

Danny has a sudden realization, recognizing the name on the lawsuit as a fictional character from one of his old videos. He bursts out laughing, covering his face with his hands.

"We shoot the Oh my God, no way, dude. It's uh, oh my God, that's hilarious."

Setting: parking lot — bright sunlight

Danny stands in front of a beige building, reading the ridiculous claims from the fake lawsuit papers aloud to the camera.

"it's kind of funny because I don't owe her shit. We supposed to meet again, but he didn't show up. I called him many times, but he answered only one time."

Setting: outside an office building — bright, direct sunlight

Still reading the papers, Danny laughs incredulously at the claim for $10,000 and the accusation of using footage without permission.

"She wants $10,000. It says I've used her footage without permission. She gave me permission, come on."

Setting: outside an office building — bright daylight

Danny is now outside a Cracker Barrel, on the phone, reading more of the poorly written lawsuit claims from his phone.

"But after that he didn't pay me any penny. But he post that video in YouTube after that he got money."

Setting: outside Cracker Barrel — bright, natural daylight

Danny explains to the person on the phone that the plaintiff is mistaken about the source of his income, clarifying it was from merchandise, not the YouTube video in question.

"That's I posted a check saying I got 100 grand in a month. That was from a merch check, not even from YouTube, dude. She's she's an idiot."

Setting: outside Cracker Barrel — bright daylight

Danny continues his phone call, laughing as he confirms to the person on the other end that he was indeed served with the ridiculous lawsuit papers while in Florida.

"Are you in LA right now? I'm in Florida. somebody fucking served you in Florida? Yeah. She paid somebody to serve you in Florida?"

Setting: outside Cracker Barrel — bright daylight

Danny laughs hysterically on the phone, repeating the absurd case name from the lawsuit, "Dong v. Duncan."

"Dong versus Duncan."

Setting: outside Cracker Barrel — bright daylight

An airplane is shown taking off and ascending into a cloudy sky, signifying travel.

Setting: sky — diffused daylight

Text: "Florida to LA"

Danny stands on the edge of a narrow pool in a modern backyard and urinates into it while talking to the camera.

"It seems like fucked up, like weird, you know? Like I shouldn't be peeing in my pool."

Setting: backyard of a modern house — bright, natural daylight

Danny walks down a steep residential street, talking to the camera about moving out of his apartment of two years.

"All right, so moving out, got a house finally. I'm going to miss this apartment, man, two years."

Setting: residential street in LA — bright, sunny

Danny salutes, says he has to return his keys, and walks away from the camera down the street.

"Got to give the keys back. We're out this bitch."

Setting: residential street — bright sunlight

A woman walks by a white Tesla with large bull horns mounted on the hood and asks Danny if he's from Texas. He gives a crude, joking reply.

"You wouldn't be from Texas, would you? From my daddy's balls, ma'am."

Setting: city street — bright daylight

Danny shows the woman a large poster of himself on a scooter, dressed in a retro outfit. She asks if he's like Evel Knievel.

"We actually took this photo on 95. Oh, cool. Are you an Evel Knievel?"

Setting: city street — bright sunlight

The woman shakes Danny's hand and gives him a heartfelt blessing for his safety, mentioning an 'invincible armor shield'.

"God bless you and protect you, keep you safe, no broken bones, invincible armor shield protect you in all your..."

Setting: city street — bright sunlight

From inside his car, Danny yells at a man in a convertible who has several Lime scooters in his passenger seat. The man in the convertible gives him the middle finger.

"You work for Bird? You work for Bird? You stealing those Limes? Is this going up on the internet?"

Setting: city street — bright daylight

The man in the convertible yells insults at Danny, calling him racist. Danny, confused, points out he's not even using his middle finger.

"Fuck you, you racist piece of shit. That's not even my middle finger. It's not even my finger. Take yo ass back to Texas."

Setting: city street — bright daylight

Danny is driving his Tesla and talking on the phone, asking his friend Chris where he is and who he's with.

"Where are you? Melrose area right now. What are you doing? Who are you with? Solo."

Setting: inside a car — bright daylight coming through the windows

Danny turns to the camera and explains to the audience why he asked about his friend's company, stating that he dislikes some of his friend's other friends.

"If you guys are wondering why I ask who he's with, it's because Chris hangs out with fucking losers that I dislike. Although I love him, I hate his friends."

Setting: inside a car — bright daylight

Danny meets his friend on a city sidewalk. They greet each other with a hug. There are electric scooters nearby.

Setting: city sidewalk — bright, sunny

Danny gets on a red electric scooter, kicks another scooter over, and rides away down the sidewalk, yelling 'get hit by a car' as a joke.

"It's called being a degenerate. Watch this. Get hit by a car."

Setting: city sidewalk — bright sunlight

Danny is standing next to a friend, both on scooters. He's lamenting a missed opportunity to jump a makeshift ramp that some workers just moved.

"Dude, I had that fucking ramp too, dude. That would have been funny."

Setting: city sidewalk — bright, natural light

Danny, on his scooter, asks a young fan if he will lie down in a dirt patch on the sidewalk so he can attempt to jump over him.

"Can you lay down on that gap in that dirt and I jump over you?"

Setting: sidewalk near a park or campus — bright daylight

Danny jumps over the young man lying on the ground with the electric scooter, landing successfully on the other side.

Setting: sidewalk — bright daylight

Danny stands on a sidewalk with two young men who are fans. One of them explains why they can't go inside his house, mentioning his dad is in his underwear.

"Ahh no it's a little weird. My dad's like in his underwear and stuff."

Setting: residential sidewalk — bright daylight

The fan confirms his dad is watching YouTube. Danny suggests they change the video to one of his. The fan pulls out his phone to do so.

"yeah he is. Oh, hell yeah. Just change that shit to me then."

Setting: apartment courtyard — daylight, slightly shadowed

Danny and his friend are inside the apartment, watching the TV. Danny talks to the fan's dad, who is sitting on the floor watching the video.

"I do YouTube. Oh yeah? You like this video? Surprising my biggest fan."

Setting: apartment living room — dark, with the main light source being the TV screen

Danny is at a park, talking to a street vendor with a colorful umbrella cart. He tries to speak Spanish, calling himself 'corn boy'.

"The corn boy. How do you say that? Is that not a word? Elote niño."

Setting: public park — golden hour, late afternoon sun

Danny jokingly accuses the corn vendor of trying to rip him off the last time they met, pointing at him playfully.

"How much this? Cuz last time you tried to rip me off. Remember? You lied to me. You looked me in the eyes and lied to my face."

Setting: public park — warm, evening light

The vendor says the corn is $2, but then tells Danny's friend it's $3. Danny reacts with mock outrage, confirming his earlier accusation that the vendor tries to rip people off.

"$2. For you, $3. See? He did that. No, he did that shit to me, dude. He tried ripping me off. I swear to God."

Setting: public park — golden hour

Danny takes a huge, enthusiastic bite of the corn on the cob and exclaims how much he loves it, with his mouth full.

"Oh! I love this stuff."

Setting: public park — warm, setting sun

Danny confronts his friend (the cameraman) about the earlier incident with the man in the convertible, asking him directly if he thinks he's racist. The friend says no.

"You cannot fucking lie to me or the viewers. You have to be completely honest with yourself and the black community. Do you think I'm racist? No."

Setting: public park — evening light

Danny is trying to convince a young fan to get in his car, but the fan is hesitant. Danny playfully shows he's not a threat by putting his hands inside the open car door.

"I'm not going to. Here, look, I'll put my Dude, I'll open the door and put my hands in the door. I swear. Oh my god, dude. This kid doesn't trust me."

Setting: city street at night — evening, artificial street lighting

Danny and his friends are outside a donut shop. He asks a woman buying a lot of donuts how many she's getting, and she responds defensively.

"How many donuts are you getting? I don't know, I haven't decided. Why? I'm just curious."

Setting: outside California Donuts — evening, light from the shop interior and neon sign

Text: "CALIFORNIA DONUTS"

Danny is on a FaceTime call in his backyard with Jacob Sartorius, who is challenging him to a game of ping pong for $1,000.

"I'll play you right now in ping pong for a G cash. Let's go. You down?"

Setting: backyard — daylight

Still on the FaceTime call, Jacob Sartorius confidently tells Danny he's going to find a ping pong table for their match.

"I'm going to find a table. I'm telling you right now, bro, let's play some ping pong."

Setting: backyard (for Danny) — indoor lighting

Danny is walking down a street at dusk, holding a drink, and sees Jacob Sartorius and his friend walking towards him. He comments on Jacob's flashy outfit.

"This kid looks insane, dude."

Setting: city street — fading daylight and streetlights

Inside a restaurant, Danny shows Jacob how to use a pepper grinder by twisting it, as Jacob apparently broke one earlier by trying to shake it.

"Basically when you use it, you do this, look. Just twist it."

Setting: restaurant — warm, ambient indoor lighting

In a parking lot at night, Danny is talking to another man, explaining that a Russian fan asked him to film a short clip saying 'Fuck you Grisha'.

"This guy asked me to film this earlier. Some Russian guy. He's like, I'm Russian."

Setting: parking lot at night — dark, lit by streetlights

Danny and the Russian fan hug and playfully wrestle in the parking lot between two cars before parting ways.

"All right, bro. Be safe."

Setting: parking lot at night — dim, from streetlights

Danny walks through a parking lot at night, explaining the backstory of the ping pong challenge to the camera.

"All right, Jacob Sartorius calls me randomly. I'm like, what the fuck's this kid calling me about? And he's like, dude, I'm going to fucking beat your ass in ping pong."

Setting: parking lot at night — dark, with harsh artificial lighting from buildings

Danny is at the counter of a ping pong hall, paying for a table. He asks the older man behind the counter if he remembers him from a few years ago.

"Ping pong. Do you remember me or no? I used to come here a lot. Yeah, a couple years ago."

Setting: ping pong hall — bright, fluorescent overhead lighting

Jacob Sartorius and his friend walk into the ping pong hall. Jacob is carrying a backpack and looks ready to play.

"Let's go, coach. Let's go, coach."

Setting: ping pong hall — bright fluorescent lighting

Jacob Sartorius pulls a large stack of cash out of his backpack and places it on the ping pong table, telling Danny he studied his old videos to prepare.

"You know what I watched in the car? I watched you playing ping pong right here."

Setting: ping pong hall — bright fluorescent lighting

Danny and Jacob play a rally of ping pong. Danny is wearing a grey t-shirt and Jacob is in a purple tie-dye shirt.

Setting: ping pong hall — bright fluorescent lighting

A meme graphic appears showing a person leaning forward in their chair. Jacob celebrates a point, realizing he has a significant lead.

"You ready? 8-2 I think. That means I could mess up on six and we'd be tied."

Setting: ping pong hall — bright fluorescent lighting

Danny scores a point against Jacob. A score graphic appears showing Danny with 3 points and Jacob with 8.

"There's one mess up."

Setting: ping pong hall — bright fluorescent lighting

Text: "3 - 8"

After a long rally that Danny loses, Jacob's friend comments that it seems Jacob is now taking the game seriously.

"I feel like he wasn't trying for the first half and now he's actually trying."

Setting: ping pong hall — bright fluorescent lighting

The game is tied 25-25. After a short rally, Jacob misses a shot, and Danny exclaims 'Nice hit' sarcastically as the ball goes out.

"Oh! Nice hit."

Setting: ping pong hall — bright fluorescent lighting

Text: "25 - 25"

Danny wins the final point of the game. He raises his arms in victory, and Jacob looks defeated. The final score is 28-26.

"Ah!"

Setting: ping pong hall — bright fluorescent lighting

Text: "28 - 26"

Danny and Jacob shake hands over the net. Jacob looks disappointed, putting his hands on his head. Danny compliments his playing.

"Good game, sir. Thought you would suck way worse than that."

Setting: ping pong hall — bright fluorescent lighting

Jacob, defeated, bends over the ping pong table in disbelief. Danny points at him, acknowledging how close the game was.

"Gosh. That was so close. Sweating, dude."

Setting: ping pong hall — bright fluorescent lighting

In an outro clip, Danny is squatting over the edge of the pool again, this time with his shorts pulled down, holding toilet paper as if he's about to defecate into the water.

"I really don't understand the difference, honestly."

Setting: backyard of a modern house — daylight